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I have been writing about changing habits. This got me thinking about the fact that a simple change can produce a profound change in a relationship. Let us suppose that you want to change the way you respond when you feel verbally attacked. The instinctive response is t o get defensive and lash back. What about [...] I just wrote an article at my other site: http://www.budurl.com/rekindle. It is about how our relationships organize us into repetitive patterns. Have you ever noticed that after living with someone for a while that conflicts and a good bit of conversation becomes repetitive? I chatted today about the patterns we get into with friends when we [...] The right mindset does not guarantee anything. It is a great starting off point. Without effort and taking action change does not happen. Yet when we believe that effort will make a difference then we are much more likely to take action because we love to experience our personal growth. I have seen people grow when [...] A growth mindset helps you bring forth your potential while a fixed mindset limits you. In my last article I discussed the characteristics of growth mindset thinking. This time I will describe the fixed mindset. If you have a fixed mindset you believe that your talents, intelligence, and personality are fixed from birth. You are apt [...] One of the certainties of growing as a person is that temporarily there is a period of uncertainty. How we handle this “uncertainty” has a lot to do with taking our life forward or staying where we are. Right now I am coaching a woman who finds herself in such a transition point in her life. [...] I was asked the other day if there was one thing I could recommend that would improve relationships. I came up with many little things that would have immediate positive effects. For instance treating the other with kindness, showing appreciation and love, going away for a special weekend etc. Yet, I wanted to give an [...] I read an interesting observation today stressing a big drawback of living together before marriage. The reason given was that many people begin to live together before they have had a chance to experience what it is like to be independent. As a result they miss out on the growing up step of standing on [...] I read the book Three Cups of Tea by Greg Mortenson a while back. Now I am reading it again. The school my grandchildren attend has chosen this book for a family summer read. Every week the school emails us a new question to discuss. Since I am in Annapolis, Maryland and my grandchildren are [...] I am frequently asked “what in the world are boundaries?” This comes from people who have heard that it is important to have boundaries but they have no real understanding as to what that means. Here is how I like to think about boundaries. Boundaries are the imaginary lines we have drawn around ourselves. They are [...] Today I have a guest post which I wrote on my blog http://budurl.com/rekindle. I am not sure if that makes it a guest blog; however, I very much wanted to share it. The news that Tipper and Al Gore are separating after forty years of marriage has taken many by surprise. They seemed to [...] |
 
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