Posts Tagged ‘self-growth’
Monday, February 15th, 2010
“You have to expect things of yourself before you can do them” is a quote by Michael Jordan. It is evident that he expected a lot from himself and worked hard to achieve excellence in basketball and life. I think that expectations are powerful. I see expectations as being different from goals.
When we have goals we can set steps for how to achieve them. We may attain them or not. Expectations have to do with our sense of self and reflect how we value ourselves. However directions that are truly driven by our expectations of ourselves, propel us forward toward what we envision for ourselves. I think this is the kind of expectation Michael Jordan must have had of himself.
When we are in relationships we have to balance the expectations we have of ourselves, with the expectations of our partner, and what our expectations are of the relationship. This three fold task involves a sharing of hopes and dreams with each other and a formulation of joint expectations.
Then if a couple also adds children there is the balancing of the child’s expectations of him/herself and the realistic assessment of potential that guide the parent’s expectations.
After raising three children I think that besides loving them the most important contribution we made was to expect them to use whatever talents and gifts they had while teaching them effective skills for managing life responsibly.
Tags: expectations, grow as a person, Kristina von Rosenvinge, self-growth
Posted in Grow With Kristina, relationship skills | No Comments »
Saturday, January 30th, 2010
At least once a week I get an email promising fantastic changes in my life. All I would have to do is sign up with the sender’s program. Promises of financial success, no fail business ventures, finding the right partner, true happiness and so on, all by taking a brief course or program. Who wouldn’t want that?
However reality is that most of us have to work diligently at the changes we want to have happen in our life.
Change takes persistence, commitment and time. Maintaining good health involves regular exercise and good eating habits. Being a loving partner is a life long undertaking. It can not be achieved from a weekend program or a course regardless of what has been promised. True love comes by working on the relationship every day.
To be a parent in a fair and caring takes a daily commitment. Likewise, to be effective at work requires additional learning and trusting ones abilities. Most of all life requires us to keep growing and changing when necessary.
Making changes takes a serious commitment to be the best person one can be. And that in itself is a life long evolving journey.
Tags: grow, grow as a person, Making Changes, self-growth
Posted in Making Changes | No Comments »
Friday, January 15th, 2010
I have been asked as to why on this site I stress both self-growth and relationship skills. Why not just focus on one or the other. In my mind they are linked.
I think that it is through self-growth that positive changes occur in marriages/relationships. The stronger one’s self-worth (the result of self-growth) the easier it becomes to see the partner as a separate unique person. This clearer sense of self makes it possible to look at conflicts objectively and jointly look for solutions. By valuing who we are we can love others.
Molly and Doug are a couple who have struggled in their marriage. They both feel emotionally vulnerable and easily become defensive and upset with the other. They tend to blame each other for their unhappiness. They have had to look for and appreciate their own strengths and uniqueness instead of waiting for the partner to make him/her OK. As they have taken responsibility to let each other know what they think and feel they have been able to proceed with finding solutions to many of their concerns. Over the next couple weeks I will be developing many of these ideas further.
Look for my new website http://www.Rekindle Your Relationship.com in another two weeks. There you will find a free 33 Tips booklet on Rekindling Your Love.
Tags: empower, grow, Kristina von Rosenvinge, self-growth
Posted in Grow With Kristina, Making Changes, relationship skills | No Comments »
Thursday, June 4th, 2009
I am finally going to have my own Blog Talk Radio Show. The title is: Second Act Success for Baby Boomers and Beyond. The shortened version is Second Act Success. The focus of the show will be on how to make this the best time of your life.
In the second half of life the emphasis what matters shift to desiring inner happiness, having meaningful relationships, and being able to pursue ones passions. There are many people who yearn for those things but they talk them selves out of attaining them. In my radio show I will be giving specific tools for what to do in order to achieve Second Act Success. Of course each of us defines success in our own way. That is how it should be since we are all unique. The beauty is that as mature adults we have the power within us to create our life so we feel successful.
As soon as I have set up the date and time of the Second Act Success show I will post it here, twitter about it, and spread it on facebook.
Tags: baby boomers, grow, grow as a person, happiness, Kristina von Rosenvinge, self-growth
Posted in Grow With Kristina, Making Changes, self-growth | No Comments »
Monday, June 1st, 2009
Recently I came across this quote by Louis Hay that I really love because it captures the essence of self empowerment. ” When you make it OK to be yourself then you automatically allow others to be themselves. Their little habits no longer bother you so much. You release the need to “change them” as you want them to be. As you stop judging others, they release the need to judge you. Everybody gets to be free.”
The goal of self empowerment work is to be happy and content with the kind of person you are. It means accepting yourself just the way you are. When you stop judging yourself you free yourself up to make some of the changes you would like to make. You are no longer saying to yourself “I will be OK after I do this or that”. Instead by accepting yourself as being OK you can put your energy into doing the things you would like to change. For instance if you want to be healthier you may start an exercise program and eat more nutritious food. You are doing this because you want to increase the quality of your health and well being. You are no longer judging your merit rather you are making changes because you choose to do them.
Letting go of judging self and others is freeing and allows you to be the kind of person you are meant to be.
Tags: emotional fitness, empower, grow, self-growth, self-mastery
Posted in Grow With Kristina, Making Changes, self-growth | No Comments »
Monday, May 11th, 2009
Today I was interviewed by Connie Ragen Green who is teaching me all about how to create a successful internet business. The focus was on my business which is teaching people how to upgrade their lives and enhance their relationships. I do this by teaching healthy self growth and relationship skills which increase happiness, the ability to deal with whatever life brings, and relationship satisfaction.
What I enjoyed was how freely Connie tied in examples from her life to illustrate the points I was making. Anyone who listens to this interview will get a good idea as to what it means to increase your emotional fitness. We talked about options one has when one is in a personal or work situation which squelches people. We got into a lengthy sequence on what to do when ones feelings are hurt. I shared specific tools that will help people get back in control and figure out what action to take.
You can listen to this interview here.
I would love to hear your comments and suggestions about our interview.
Tags: communication, emotional fitness, grow, relationship, relationships. grow your potential, self-growth
Posted in Grow With Kristina, Making Changes, communication, relationship skills, relationships, retirement, self-growth | 3 Comments »
Wednesday, April 29th, 2009
The truth is that we have to expend energy to create energy for ourselves. And the only way to expend energy is to take action.
This morning I went to a Yoga class. It took some mental energy to get up early but the physical and emotional energy that I received from participating made it all worth while. I am a firm believer that in order to stay vibrant and healthy we have to take action. There is no other way to keep our minds alert and our bodies fit. I can say that now but for years I did not exercise at all. A few years ago I made a mental commitment to myself that I wanted to be healthy as I aged. That by itself was not enough. I had to initially force myself to follow through and start exercising. In time exercise has become an important ritual in my life.
Desiring change in our lives does not lead to change. We have to take action to make change happen. Many people hold themselves back by hoping that when they feel like it they will take action. Instead, they need to learn that by taking little conscious steps they will start creating energy and be able to take more steps that help them grow.
Tags: create energy, grow, Kristina von Rosenvinge, self-growth, take action
Posted in Grow With Kristina, Making Changes, self-growth | No Comments »
Thursday, April 23rd, 2009
No doubt we have all heard the phrase BE ALL YOU CAN BE which was the recruiting slogan of the US Army all volunteer force for over 20 years. Over the years these five words have moved outside the army to be an inspirational slogan for everyone. They represent a call for all of us to make the most of the talents and gifts that we have. It is also a known fact that most of us are short changing ourselves by settling for far less than we are capable of being.
In order to “Be All One Can Be” we have to believe that it is vital to keep stretching our mind along with building a strong emotional and physical foundation. Self-mastery comes from expecting ourselves to be able to keep growing throughout life. When we have a vision that is open to bringing forth our possibilities we will take action to live life fully.
Tags: grow, Kristina von Rosenvinge, recharge, self-growth, self-mastery
Posted in Grow With Kristina, communication, self-growth | 1 Comment »
Saturday, April 18th, 2009
One of the most important skills to learn is how to validate ourselves and others. We have to really believe that we are not what we do. We are valuable because of who we are.
I am reminded of this lovely young woman who agonized about the soup she was preparing for a get together of work colleagues.. Her anxiety about what others would think was sky high. At some point I said to her ” You are not your soup”. As she began to relax she was able to remind herself that she volunteered to bring the soup because it was always a favorite. Besides these were all people that she cared about so the task for her became to enjoy the other people. The soup was a success. The best part was that by showing interest in the others she had a great time. No doubt we can recall situations where our anxiety about ourselves became our preoccupation and we lost sight of focusing on others.
Tip of the day:
You are not what you do, you are valuable because of who you are.
Tags: anxiety, empower, grow, Kristina von Rosenvinge, self-growth
Posted in Grow With Kristina, relationship skills, self-growth | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, April 7th, 2009
For the next thirty days I will be daily sharing specific relationship skills. What do I mean by successful relationships? I see it as people relating to each other in a way that each feels accepted, valued, and respected by the other. I will be sharing tips that will enhance self mastery and the interaction between people. From the time we are born we are in relationships. Some of the relationships we have been in have helped us grow while others may have stifled us.
My hope is that by learning effective self growth and relationship skills you can discard coping mechanisms that limit you and substitute skills that will enhance you and your relationships.
Tags: coping skills, Kristina von Rosenvinge, relationship skills, relationships, self-growth, self-mastery
Posted in Grow With Kristina | 1 Comment »
