Communication:”Saying Nothing Sometimes Says The Most”

A friend of mine who is an action taker has as her byline: “Saying nothing sometimes says the most.” She gets involved in causes she believes in because to say nothing  to her means she does not care.  As I look back on my life I can see that there have been  many times when I said nothing even though I felt deeply about the issue at hand.  At the same time I know that I feel better about myself when I use my voice to express what I think both in my family and in my other interactions.

I started wondering why  it is that so often we do not use our voice.  I have coached many people who initially limited themselves by their silence. They  knew what they want and needed but were loath to express it.  They worried  what others would  think.  The fear of possibly getting ridiculed, put down, laughed at got in the way of actually expressing what really mattered to them.  This mindset means that saying nothing becomes a powerful  way of  communicating.   To others it appears that there are no concerns.

Using our voices gives us power.  However, this power has to be balances with also listening to the voices of others.  When we do that we are more apt to find solutions to what matters to us.  Saying nothing, when we know better,  is a way of shutting down a part of ourselves. Then “saying nothing  sometimes says the most” becomes communication that will leave us feeling powerless.